When explaining that night...as he so often did, he told me about the female lawyer that he had seen once before. She was with a firm named Wolfram and Hart, and I could hear the voices calling me now, going back to that same name as if I were supposed to do something about it, and then mentioning the name of Wolfram and Hart. He described that night and the night where he had first seen Angelus again, and the description of the lawyer sort of matched with the girl in that white room and outside of the very bars where I currently was. He didn't know her name, but I had from the short lawyer. Her name was Lilah, and the description fit. She was leggy and really beautiful. More beautiful then Sunny and almost as beautiful as Cordelia, but the voices told me that she was evil and I knew that she was holding me.
I didn't understand it. Angel was an enemy to this firm and this firm was bad. They were holding me against my will, and they were bad. So why would my evil biological so-called father, who gave me up oppose them? I had seen him fight demons but I thought that it was just to make me think that he was good. Holtz had told me what Angelus had done to his family, and it was my duty to avenge that, but still, I couldn't do it while locked away by Lilah here at Wolfram and Hart, who were enemies of my father. It was all so hard to understand, and it was frustrating and pissed me off not to be able to understand and to not be able to get out of my restraints.
I fought with them, wriggling, tearing, pulling, but all that it did was make me tired and I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to focus on the rage and let it get me out of these restraints, eventually. I wanted to think about Angelus killing Holtz' family and think about how he was going to pay for that. I wanted to think about how Angelus tried to lure me into the hotel under the guise of being my father, when he was just a filthy demon who was going to suffer for what he did. I wanted to think about the Lilah lawyer and Wolfram and Hart holding me hostage, and what I was going to do to her when I got out, and the other lawyer, here at Wolfram and Hart, regardles of her beauty. And, I didn't want to fall asleep and hear the voices whispering that name.
Puvain...Puvain. Just another name heard and somebody else who was going to pay in this crappy world. I missed Holtz and I missed Quortoth. Things were clear there and there weren't so many demons who pretended to be good and humans who were almost entirely bad.
Puvain...Puvain. I hated this place. I was going to get out of these restraints. My scream was loud enough to drown out the screams of that name. Puvain...Puvain.